Scattered Leaves Read online

  My brain was in such turmoil that I didn't see how I would fall asleep. The music, the alcopops. Stuart's tongue kiss, all of it whirled around. I felt as if I'd been spinning in the bed. I finally fell asleep, but again I woke up in the middle of the night, Vaguely. I remembered the sobbing I had heard the night before, but this time I could hear Great-aunt Frances washing her face in the bathroom and humming something. I knew she had looked in on me. but I didn't think I should show her I was awake. Minutes later. I was asleep again, and this time. I didn't wake up until I felt myself being shaken.

  Alanis was standing at the side of my bed.

  "Damn. girl, you gonna need an alarm clock. She's dead asleep. too. Lucky, for Granddad. Get up and dressed quickly. Stuart should be here by now if he's going to hook up that gas tank before he takes us to school. Hurry," she urged.

  I was so confused. To me it was as if I'd still been in a dream. I didn't wake up fully until after I had washed and dressed and gone down to at least have a piece of orange. Great-aunt Frances finally rose herself and hurried down the stairs in her nightgown.

  "Oh, good, you're up." she cried. "I'm sorry I overslept. We'll make sure the clocks are on alarm for tomorrow. Did you have some breakfast?"

  I nodded. I really wasn't very hungry. but I remembered what Alanis had told me.

  "I need lunch money." I said.

  "Oh, dear, lunch money. Yes. I found some money yesterday. I had forgotten about it." Her eyes widened with excitement, and she went to the cabinet under the sink. She pulled out a can of soap powder and opened the top. It was full of tens and twenties. "I don't know why I forgot this," she said. "It's been under here so long."

  Lucky Mae Betty doesn't do her job that well, I thought. She would have found it for sure. and I had no doubt she would have taken it.

  "Take all that to your room. Great-aunt Frances," I told her. "Otherwise, it will disappear."

  "Yes. I will. Yes. Here," she said, handing me a twenty. That should be enough."

  "Thanks," I said and reminded her to take the money to her room. "Put it somewhere safe," I said.

  "I will. Oh, look at you. That's a lovely dress, a wonderful dress for the first day of school,"

  "Thank you. Grandmother Emma bought it for me."

  "Emma can be generous when she wants to be. Oh, dear, where's your schoolbag?"

  "I forgot it," I said. "Thanks for reminding me."

  I ran back upstairs to get it, then hurried back down. She stood at the doorway, waiting.

  "Good luck to you, dear. I remember my first day of school like it was yesterday."

  "It's not my first day of school: I reminded her. "It's my first day here."

  "Oh, yes. Funny," she said, thinking for a moment, "but it's as if you were always here. I must be still dreaming."

  She leaned over to give me a kiss. then I opened the door and stepped out. Alanis was in the driveway, waiting, the brim of her hat down nearly over her eyes. She kicked a stone and looked up at me. "That idiot didn't show to hook up the tank. They'll be no time for it now. C'mon," she said, walking ahead down the driveway. She looked at her watch when I caught up. "He'd better be here in five minutes or we'll have to take the bus."

  She leaned to look down the road. A car came by and then a bigger truck than Stuart's, but he didn't appear. Alanis looked Yen, annoyed.

  "See?" she said. "Boys can't be trusted with anything. Their promises aren't worth a damn," she added when the school bus appeared. It slowed and then stopped in front us. I looked at Alanis, who made no move to board the bus. "C'mon," she said finally and tugged me to walk around and go up the stairway. The bus driver, a round-faced, stout man with just a ribbon of hair above his temples and down over his ears, smiled at us.

  "Welcome, girls. Now take your seats and stay in them until the bus comes to a stop at the school. No wandering about in motion." he warned.

  Alanis ignored him. She paused and looked down the aisle at the other riders. Everyone looked primped and prepared, especially the other girls. Two older boys sat opposite each other, both taking up the entire seat by putting their legs across them.

  I could see that some of the children had their faces pressed to the window, looking up the driveway to catch a glimpse, perhaps. of Great-aunt Frances. Alanis nudged me and nodded at them.

  "What are you looking at so hard?" she snapped at them, and they turned away quickly.

  The rear seat was empty. Alanis headed for it and dropped herself onto it, folding her arms and glaring out the window. I joined her and the bus started again. She looked back once and then at me. Her face brightened with a thought.

  "Hey, did you get your lunch money?"

  "Yes."

  "How much?"

  I showed her and she beamed.

  "I told you she had money buried. Did you see where she got it?"

  I hesitated just long enough for the smile to fade from her face. "Remember, Sister, no secrets, no lies. Well?"

  It seemed to me that there was a time to lie. If I told her what Great-aunt Frances had, she would want to go look for it and might steal it.

  "She just gave it to me," I said.

  "You didn't see where she took it?" I shook my head.

  "You lying, girl," she said. "You're not good at it. You'll have to study me. That's okay. You'll tell me." She smiled with confidence. "Yes, you will. And soon. too. You'll see that I'm the best friend you ever had and ever will have."

  She sat back, looked out the window, thought a moment, then leaned forward to take the twenty from me.

  "I better hold this for you. Too many thieves in that school." She stuffed the twenty into her jeans and leaned back again.

  The bus rolled along, stopping to pick up students along the way. By the time we arrived at the school. I felt nauseous. but I swallowed it back and followed everyone out. This was, after all, the first time I had ever ridden a bus to school. All my school life, my mother had brought me to school on the first day. She'd been there holding my hand and assuring me I was fine and I was going to enjoy the experience. My teachers had been nice and full of smiles. They'd all known who we were.

  Because other buses from other directions were unloading at about the same time, a sea of students poured into the entrance. Most were talking loudly, calling to each other and laughing. Everyone seemed to know everyone else. Was I the only new student in the whole school this year? If anyone looked at me, it was just a glance. Everyone was more interested in hearing from students he or she knew. For a while. I felt invisible, even though I was being bumped and pushed along. I reached into my bag to get my diagram of the school. but Alanis seized my elbow before I could get the paper out.

  "Forget that. I'll show you where you go, Jordan. Just move or we'll get trampled."

  She held on to me firmly and took me around a corner and down another corridor.

  "You're in here," she said, stopping at my classroom, "The cafeteria is down this hall. You turn right and it's right there. I gotta go upstairs. Uh-oh," she said, "here comes Chad."

  He approached us quickly.

  "Ah, you and the little rich girl," he said. "How cozy."

  "Do I know you?" she asked him.

  "Funny. Why didn't you call me?"

  "I've lost your phone number," she said. "For good."

  "Yeah. right. You'll be back," he said, but not with great confidence.

  "If I'm desperate," she told him. He smirked, looked at me and walked away, "See?" she said to me. "Keep them in their place. I'll see you at lunch."

  You better, I thought. You have my lunch money.

  "When I see that Stuart, I'm going to tear off an ear," she added and walked on.

  I watched her for a moment. Some girls and a boy jostled me back as they hurried into the classroom. I followed slowly. When I entered. I noted that everyone was rushing to choose his or her seat. Our teacher wasn't in the room vet. Those who had sat turned to look my way. Their faces were full of curiosity.

  I
really am the only new student, I thought. They're not looking at anyone else the same way.

  "This is Mrs. Morgran's third grade," a tall, thin, dark-haired girl with thin, almost nonexistent lips told me. The right corner of her mouth dipped at the end of her sentence.

  "I know." I said.

  "You're in third grade?" she asked and left her mouth open.

  I didn't answer. I looked to the seat on the far side in the rear and headed toward it, but just before I reached it. Another student, a chubby boy with hair the color of wet hay, charged past me and slid into the chair as if he'd been sliding into first base in a baseball game. The students around us laughed.

  "That's not very polite." I said. He smiled and looked at the students seated around us. I thought of what Alanis had just said and folded my arms, stepping closer to him. "Get out of my seat or I'll rip off your ear," I told him.

  His face seemed to sink in the thin smile falling to shatter at his feet. He glanced at the others, at me, and then got up and sliding to the desk two desks ahead. Everyone else stared at me as I took the seat.

  Moments later. Mrs. Morgan entered. She was tall, with graying dark-brown hair cut sharply at her tars, every strand perfect. She wore no earrings, but she had a necklace of small pearls that lay just under the open collar of her one-piece dark-blue dress, which fell in a baggy fashion to about two inches above her ankles. The dress seemed to erase any figure she might have. There was no way to

  distinguish her waist, and she looked to be as flat chested as some of her sixth-grade girls, but certainly not me.

  Her gaunt cheeks were tightened at the corners of her thin pale lips, which pursed as she put her bag on the desk and took out her class register. She put on a pair of dark-rimmed glasses that magnified her dull brown eyes. The other students apparently knew her well enough to quiet down and sit still while she flipped silently through pages. cleared her throat and looked up. She panned the room slowly, nodding. until she reached me. She stared at me so long that I felt like I was under a microscope,

  "I know all of you, of course, from move-up day last year, except our new student, Jordan March, Jordan, please stand." she said.

  I did, and she looked at me even harder. I didn't know what to do or say because she wasn't saying anything. She looked again at something in her register and then at me.

  "Jordan." she said. "has just moved here from Bethlehem. Let's welcome her."

  She nodded. and the class clapped.

  "I begin every class year with my students writing their biographies. We pass them around so everyone gets to know everyone else well," she said. "Take out a sheet of paper and your pens. please."

  Instantly, the chubby boy who had slid into the seat I wanted raised his hand.

  "Yes, Gary?"

  "I didn't bring a pen and paper yet."

  "Why not? What did you think we would do today?"

  He shrugged.

  She looked around.

  "Anyone else ill prepared?"

  No one raised his or her hand.

  "Apparently, you are the only negligent student. Gary. You'll start the sixth-grade year with a negative point." She opened her top desk drawer, took out a pen, ripped a sheet of paper off a pad, and brought it to him.

  "Okay," she said when she returned to her desk. "Who can tell me what you all should include in your biography?"

  Many hands went up.

  "Mona," she said.

  A small girl with pretty light-brown hair stood up.

  "We should tell about our family, where we were born and where we live and lived, what we like to do, what we want to be, places we have gone and favorite things like favorite foods and shows and stuff." she recited.

  "Don't say 'stuff.' Otherwise, you are correct. All right, begin please and write clearly, neatly and carefully," she said.

  Everyone started. What should I tell about my family? I wondered. Should I tell anything about Ian?

  "Miss March," Miss Morgan said. "Please come up front."

  All the students stopped writing and looked at me. I rose and walked to her desk.

  "I understand you are living with your greataunt," she said. "Yes."

  "When you go home after school today. I want you to go directly to her and tell her that you cannot return to school if you do not wear a brassiere. You know what that is, of course?"

  I nodded.

  "I will not permit you to return to my class unless you do. Do you understand?"

  "Yes, ma'am," I said.

  "Get back to your seat, please:" she said.

  I felt the blood rise to my face as I turned and saw all the students looking at me. Some of the boys were smiling, especially chubby Gary. I sat and lowered my head to begin writing. We all looked up again when we heard a knock on the door. It opened, and a girl who looked at least sixteen stepped n.

  "Yes, what is it?" Mrs. Morgan asked, not hiding her annoyance.

  "The principal would like to see Jordan March." she announced.

  Mrs. Morgan tightened the corners of her mouth. then looked at me.

  "Go ahead," she said, her voice full of annoyance. "You can leave your things right there. Don't dawdle in the hallway when you return either. Get right back to do your work."

  I rose and joined the girl at the door. As soon as she closed it behind us, she turned to me and smiled.

  "This is your first day here. right?"

  "yYs," I said. "Is that why the principal sent for me?"

  "No," she said, widening her smile. "Boy, are you in trouble." she said.

  9 Parfait

  . In the principal's outer office, where, behind the long counter, two secretaries scurried between two desks and large file cabinets. Alanis. Nikki and Raspberry sat on the black sofa. waiting. They looked up at me as soon as I entered, my appearance obviously taking them all by surprise.

  "Her. too?" Nikki muttered.

  "Jordan March is here," the student helper announced. One of the secretaries paused, her face twisting like a rubber mask with displeasure at being interrupted.

  "Take a seat with the others." she told me. "And no talking, Mrs. Browne will tell us when to send you in to see her."

  Alanis sat between Nikki and Raspberry on the settee. I sat quickly in the only chair. Of course. I wondered why we were all here. I had never been called out of class to go to the principal's office at my school in Bethlehem.

  "What is this?" Nikki moaned. "Why did she call all of us to the office? Maybe its got something to do with last night. Why else would she be here?"

  "Shut up,' Alanis said. She watched the secretaries and the student helper, and then she leaned toward me.

  "Remember. Whatever it is, we die first," she whispered and then sat back.

  The door to the principal's office opened, and a policeman stepped out, his hat in his hands. He gazed at us a moment, shook his head and walked out of the office.

  "Police! We're in trouble." Nikki muttered, her voice cracking. "Oh, we're in some kind of big trouble."

  "I told you to shut up," Alanis said. "Whatever it is. I'll do all the talking.'"

  We heard a buzzer. One of the secretaries picked up a phone and said. "Right away_ Mrs. Browne." She hung up and turned to us. "All of you go in now," she said.

  We rose. I was too frightened to take a breath. I looked at Alanis, but she didn't seem in the least afraid. She actually smiled at me.

  Mrs. Browne's office had a nicer leather sofa and two leather chairs. One wall was covered with shelves of books, and another had plaques and pictures. The walnut brown rug looked brand new. She had a large, dark cherrywood desk with everything on it neatly organized. With her hands clasped behind her back, she was standing by her window and looking out when we entered. It was a large, two-paneled window that faced the ballfield. It had blinds that were pulled up evenly and dark-brown dress curtains with gold tassels,

  "Close the door,' she said. I imagined she could see it reflected in the window glass. Raspberry hurried to d
o so. Then Mrs. Browne turned slowly.

  I thought she had wide shoulders for a woman. She had a heavy bosom and wide hips, too, but her face frightened me because it looked like someone had taken an ice pick and poked tiny holes in her cheeks and even in the sides of her chin. She wore a dark red lipstick, which picked up the reddish brown hair she had cut stylishly at the base of her neck. Her eyes rere a bright shade of blue. If it weren't for her pockmarks, she would be pretty, I thought.

  "Sit," she commanded, as if she'd been speaking to four dogs. "And you. Alanis, take off that hat. You don't wear your hat in school."

  Sullenly. Alanis took it off.

  I went for the chair. Alanis sat in the other chair. and Nikki and Raspberry sat on the sofa.

  We waited, no one moving, me holding my breath. as Mrs. Browne paused and looked up. It was as if she was reading something off the ceiling or saying some prayer. Then she lowered her head and fixed her eyes on each of us the way someone might fix her target in her gun sights. I had never seen anyone who could turn her eyes into cold, piercing orbs like this. It was as if she'd had tiny flashlights behind them. I felt myself actually shudder with a stab of ice at the base of my neck.

  "Let me begin by telling the four of you that I've been principal here for nearly twenty-eight years and this is the first time I've had a serious problem brought to me on the first day, actually even before the day has had a chance to begin. With all the work we have getting organized. I have little or no time for behavioral problems, but this one is so serious..." She paused, put her hand over her heart and took a breath, "Perhaps the most serious one I've had in my twentyeight years. and I have no choice but to deal with it immediately.

  "All of your parents are in the process of being contacted." she continued. "You." she said, turning to me. "are living with your Great-aunt?"

  I nodded, I was afraid that if I spoke, my voice would fail me and nothing would come from my lips.